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It is hard to be happy with your financial situation when all around you cries 'risk'. But Lynda Moore says you will be a lot better off if you can be happy with your money

Personal Finance / opinion
It is hard to be happy with your financial situation when all around you cries 'risk'. But Lynda Moore says you will be a lot better off if you can be happy with your money
money happiness

It’s almost the election, which makes most people jittery about money-based decisions. But I am here to encourage you to be happy about your finances no matter the political environment.  It’s not an ideal situation, but often in abnormal times we surprise each other.

Why do so many of us wait to be happy?  What is wrong with being happy right now?  And why do we look to money to make us happy?

There is no denying the fact that if you live in a situation where you don’t have enough money to fulfil your basic needs of life like food, clothing and shelter, then the answer is YES, more money will make me happier.  It will also make you healthier and less stressed.

So, let’s make the assumption that you are earning sufficient to meet the basic needs and a few of the extras that are nice to have so that you may feel more satisfied with your life, but not necessarily any happier.

What are 3 things you can do right now to improve your money happiness?

1.  Stop having the “I’ll be happy when….” conversations with yourself.

All you are doing is putting off being happy now and waiting for some future date when something happens over which we may have no control.

Take some time to look around you.  Who is in your life that makes you happy right now?  Friends?  Family?  What fun things have you done that have brought a smile to your face?

Take pride in your accomplishments to date.  Go for a walk, maybe watch the sunset/rise if you can.  Tell your partner or children that you love them.  Start looking inside yourself rather than externally for your happiness.

If you are struggling to find people and places that make you happy.  Start a gratitude diary.

Write down one thing every day that you are grateful for.  You’ll soon find you have plenty of reasons to be happy with your life just as it is.

2.  Look at your photos 

Does this bring a smile to your face?

The key point here is: Spend your money on experiences, not just ‘stuff’.  Dr Thomas Gilovich, a psychologist from Cornell University, has been studying the link between money and happiness for several decades and after four studies still comes to the conclusion: “Happiness is derived from experiences, not things.”

“We buy things to make us happy and we succeed – but only for a little while.  New things are exciting to us at first, but then we adapt to them.”

While we think buying a new car or TV will make us happy and it will for a while.  Then the car becomes part of our routine and we start to search for new ways of finding happiness.

But experiences, on the other hand, linger in our memory.  Something we see or hear will trigger a fond memory of a trip somewhere and that experience become part of our identity.  We have animated conversations with friends who have visited the same places we have, we like to compare notes about shows we have been to or recommend a good movie to others.

Dr Gilovich continues, “You can really like your material stuff.  You can even think that part of your identity is connected to those things, but nonetheless they remain separate from you.  In contrast, your experiences really are a part of you.  We’re the sum total of our experiences.”

Take a little time to reflect on the past few weeks and answer this question for yourself:  What made you happier, stuff or experiences?  This will give you a very good guide into how you want to spend your money in the future.

So, don’t just keep a list of ‘stuff’ you would love to own.  Keep another list of all the places you would like to see and things you would like to do.

Before you spend your hard-earned cash, have a look at both lists and ask yourself this question, “right now which will make me happier, stuff or experiences?”

3.  Buy a gift for a loved one or donate to a charity.

This may sound a little counter intuitive, particularly if money is tight.  The book, ‘Happy Money: The Science of Happier Spending‘ (Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton) has this to say, “New research demonstrates that spending money on others provides a bigger happiness boost than spending money on yourself.”

What is even more interesting, it this applies to a very broad range of circumstances from a student buying a scarf for Mum, to a Ugandan woman buying malaria medication for a friend.  “Investing in others can make individuals feel healthier and wealthier” Dunn says.

Who do you know that could do with a bit of a helping hand or cheering up?  Maybe you could pay for someone to mow your elderly neighbour’s lawn. Make a gift for Mum.  Write that letter/email that you’ve been putting off.  How does that make you feel?

And here is a bonus one - Use your Money to buy time.

Once time is gone, we can never get it back.  Not spending enough time with family and friends and doing things that make us happy is something I hear a lot when working with clients.

Ask yourself this question.  What can I purchase/outsource that will change how I use my time to add to my happiness?  

While money does smooth the road, true happiness is more likely to be found in a sunny afternoon spent with your children, a romantic picnic with your spouse or a good catch-up with a close friend.  If you can invest time in making these things a priority, it’s far more likely that you’ll feel satisfied with your life in general.

It comes down to this: it really doesn’t matter how much we earn or who we are. It’s all about how we think about money.  How we align money to our core values, who we choose to share our money with and how we choose to spend it will determine how much of it we need to make us happy.

Love your money happiness.

If you want to get your money and happiness levels aligned, or you would like to discover how you can change the way you think about your money, then drop me an email or comment below.

Why wait to be money happy? Start today.


*Lynda Moore is a Money Mentalist coach and New Zealand’s only certified New Money Story® mentor. Lynda helps you understand why you do the things you do with your money, when we all know we should spend less than we earn. You can contact her here.

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4 Comments

it really doesn’t matter how much we earn

That would be nice, but the evidence doesn't bear this out.

https://www.economist.com/graphic-detail/2021/02/05/money-buys-happines…

 

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Thanks for sharing the link and the article. 

There are always lots of different points of view and research to back it up when it comes to money. 

We are all different, and some readers will resonate with what I have written and others won't. 

And that's what I love about being able to contribute on this platform, it gets the conversations about money happening.

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Linda, you are a breath of fresh air ! Your column and advice are, well... on the money.  It's wonderful that you demystify money and that you often talk about the psychology (or taboo) of money.

It's a shame that there aren't more Interest readers commenting on your column, when there are over a hundred comments on most articles relating to houses. They would be far better off, and happier indeed, to read and follow the advice above !

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Thanks so much for your lovely comment, I really appreciate it. 

I am a new contributor, so it will take time for the readership to grow. 

 

 

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